Not ill, but not firing on all cylinders either? Here are the usual reasons men in midlife feel flat, what you can fix yourself and when to see your GP.
Nothing is exactly wrong. You get up, go to work, pay the bills and watch something on the telly that you won’t remember next week. But somewhere along the way the volume got turned down. Saturdays feel like admin. The things that used to give you a lift now get a shrug.
If that sounds familiar, there is usually a reason. Often it’s dull and fixable, and now and then it’s worth a GP appointment. It is almost never something a pricey tub of capsules will sort out.
Being tired and feeling flat are close cousins, and in midlife they tend to arrive together. The NHS says most ongoing tiredness comes down to lifestyle and everyday pressures: poor sleep, stress, too much alcohol, too little movement and a diet that runs mostly on beige food. Medical causes come further down the list, but they do exist.
The awkward part is that all of this creeps up on you. Nobody wakes up one morning running on half power. It builds over months, and because everyone around you is knackered too, it’s easy to decide this is just what being 52 feels like.
It isn’t, or at least it doesn’t have to be. Before you put it down to age, check the basics. They are boring, and they do most of the heavy lifting.
Sleep comes first. Most adults need somewhere between seven and nine hours. If you’re getting six broken hours, then scrolling your phone in bed and sinking two glasses of red to unwind, you’ve found a large part of the answer. Alcohol helps you drop off but wrecks the second half of the night. NHS guidance is no more than 14 units a week, spread over three or more days, with some alcohol-free days. That’s roughly six pints of average-strength beer.
Movement comes next. It sounds backwards, but when you’re tired the answer is often to do more, not less. The UK guidelines are 150 minutes of moderate activity a week, such as brisk walking or cycling, plus strength exercises on two days. You don’t need a gym membership or Lycra. A 30-minute walk at lunchtime on weekdays covers the main target.
Then there’s food and weight. Big carb-heavy lunches, skipped breakfasts and grazing all evening give you energy spikes and slumps. Carrying extra weight round the middle also makes sleep worse and raises your risk of type 2 diabetes, which brings its own fatigue. Losing even a stone (about 6.4kg) can make a noticeable difference to how you feel.
Finally, daylight. In the darker months many of us go to work in the dark and come home in the dark. The NHS advises everyone to consider a daily vitamin D supplement of 10 micrograms in autumn and winter, roughly October to March. It’s cheap, the advice is official and there’s nothing exotic about it. Just don’t expect it to turn you into a new man by Tuesday.
Feeling flat is a symptom, not a personality trait. Find the cause before you start buying cures.
The supplement shelves are full of products promising vitality, drive and the energy of a man half your age. Some contain B vitamins, magnesium, ginseng or a long list of plant extracts, and they usually cost more than your weekly coffee habit.
Here is the blunt version. If you are actually deficient in something, such as iron, vitamin B12 or vitamin D, putting it right can make a real difference. But the way to find out is a blood test, not guesswork. If you aren’t deficient, there’s little good evidence that topping up makes you feel any livelier. Some products also interact with prescribed medicines, so if you’re on regular medication, have a word with your pharmacist before adding anything.
The same caution goes for anything sold as a testosterone booster. Testosterone falls only gradually with age, by around 1% a year from your 30s or 40s, and for most men that isn’t enough to cause problems. The NHS points out that symptoms often blamed on a so-called male menopause, such as low mood, low libido and fatigue, are more often down to stress, depression, poor sleep or alcohol. When a man genuinely has low testosterone, a GP can test for it properly. Over-the-counter boosters are not the answer.
The NHS advises seeing a GP if you’ve felt tired for several weeks without an obvious reason, or if the tiredness comes with other symptoms. Things worth mentioning include unexplained weight loss or gain, being very thirsty or needing to wee more often, snoring with pauses in your breathing or waking up gasping, feeling cold all the time, breathlessness, or swelling in your ankles.
Behind those symptoms can sit common, treatable conditions: anaemia, an underactive thyroid, type 2 diabetes and sleep apnoea. Your GP may suggest blood tests to rule these in or out. It’s a short conversation and a quick needle, and it could save you years of feeling below par.
Be honest about your mood, too. Depression in men often doesn’t look like sitting in a dark room crying. It can look like irritability, losing interest in things you used to enjoy, drinking more, working all hours or simply feeling numb. If any of that rings a bell, tell your GP. You can also refer yourself to NHS talking therapies in England without seeing a GP first, and similar psychological services exist in Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland, although how you get to them varies. If you ever feel you might harm yourself, call 999 or contact Samaritans on 116 123, free and at any time.
If you live in England, are aged 40 to 74 and don’t already have certain conditions such as heart disease or diabetes, you should be invited for a free NHS Health Check every five years. It checks your blood pressure, cholesterol, weight and diabetes risk, and it’s a sensible place to raise how you’ve been feeling. If your invitation hasn’t turned up, ask your GP practice.
Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland don’t run the same national programme, so if you live there, book a routine appointment with your GP practice and ask for a general review. Either way, you’ll go in with a list, not a vague feeling.
Start a simple diary for a fortnight beforehand. Note when you went to bed, how you slept, what you drank and when the slumps hit. It makes the appointment far more useful, and you may well spot the pattern yourself before you get there.
Feeling flat in midlife is common, but it isn’t just something that comes with age. It’s usually down to sleep, alcohol, inactivity, diet, stress or low mood, and most of that you can work on yourself. Supplements only help if blood tests show you’re actually short of something. If you’ve been tired for weeks with no clear reason, or you have other symptoms, see your GP and use your free NHS Health Check if you’re eligible.
Feeling tired, short-tempered and low on energy is easy to put down to age. Sometimes there’s a fixable cause, and a GP blood test will tell you more than a shelf of supplements.
Low vitamin D is common in UK winters and is often blamed for tiredness in midlife. Here’s what the NHS recommends, what the evidence says and when to see your GP.
Midlife energy slumps usually come down to how you sleep, eat and move. Here’s how to plan a day that keeps you going, and when tiredness needs a GP.
Feeling flat, tired and short-tempered in your fifties? Low testosterone is one possible cause, but often not the main one. Here’s how to tell, and how to get tested on the NHS.
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